Snug as a bug

Watching Jimmy Neutron as you do.

My poor pudding. He's already a tv casualty.

Fiddles!

My kids ought to be grateful I love them. Even though it was hot as bacon grease and I was feeling equally salty after dragging dirty clothes back and forth to the laundry, I dragged my behind down to the local library as promised and willingly sat among squealing small children for some story time brought to us by Fiddlin' Dan, the Mountain Man. As an aside,And for some reason, everytime I read the phrase Fiddlin' Dan my mind says, "Lieutenant Dan, I got yer ice creaaaaaam!"

I'm not going to lie and tell you it was the most entertaining experience of my life, particularly given that I saw Daniel Tosh perform live just a few months ago, but for the setting, it was actually pretty cool. Fiddlin' Dan is really great with kids. He even took note of what a handsome, strapping little man my favorite bowl of pudding is. Yes, I can be won over with flattery. Ain't no shame in that.

And my, wasn't he handsome and strapping in his little striped onesie? He was also rather enthralled with Fiddlin' Dan's talent for playing the spoons as evidenced by his rapt attention.

Of course pinky wanted in on the baby holding action and on the rapt attention action. It seems the girl behind pinky was less than thrilled with Fiddlin' Dan but the reality is poor girl was too busy giving a hearty dose of the side eye to the three hot mess little boys she hissed at for the majority of the time we were there.

And here's another shot of my youngest because my mama reads my blog and grandmas can never get enough pictures of their grandbabies.

This is his "did-someone-say-food" face.

And since I mentioned the successful, rain free laundry mission, now I can show you my latest completed sewing project, the Happy Animals t-shirt and the Bubble Stripe shorts both patterns from the Summer 2011 issue of Ottobre Design.

I really love how this turned out. I used interlock jersey from Joann's for both pieces. The top is a hunter green solid with lime green top stitching while the shorts are a split pea soup and green bean stripe. The embroidery is a design from this book which just might be my favorite embroidery book evah! ( And pick a chick, she's got another one! I'll just be adding that to my card now.)

And isn't this just the sweetest little lederhosen wearing kid in the world?

Next time, I'm gonna use a lighter brown color for the little dude's hair and eyelashes. Lord knows I don't want it looking like I dressed my kid in blackface. I think pudding might faint dead away from embarrassment.

How's that for pictures, grandma?

Let's talk about what I did right today

See, what you do is ya hold dis
thing in your hand like so . . .

So the pudding is hitting the glorious stage of discovered movement. He can not only grasp things but he can wave them around with abject glee. What he can't do is move his face even though he knows that thing is coming for his little cheeks like a freight train. So basically, he just waves his little retinue of plastic rabbit links and winces when they get too close for comfort.

And shake it like a polaroid picture

This is much cuter than it sounds, I swear.

What is also cute is the way he frantically kicks his legs in a way that makes you think he's about to fall out of the damned thing and then when you look over to see if this if he's going to go all Humpty Dumpty on your ass, he pauses, mid pudgy leg waving and smiles like he's just seen the sun.

I'm savoring these moments for when it's time to do second grade homework and he informs me he doesn't feel like I love him because I make him do things he doesn't want to.

Wut? I would never!

We'll see whose the sun then.

As promised

I am a brave, brave soul so be prepared to hold my hand.

I am attempting . . . lace knitting.

It's amazing the things people can do.

Like this gorgeous Estonian shawl.

Lyrical Lace Shawl by Fiddlesticks

I know what you're thinking and hell no, I ain't that brave. My eyes are crossing just thinking about it. I'm going to attempt something much more attainable, like this pretty little Forest Beauty Lace Shawl.

I've had my eye on it for quite a while but I was terrified of the prospect of turning a hank of yarn into a nice little ball of yarn and further terrified of turning a ball of yarn into a never ending hot mess of tangles roaming around my house like a kitty on crack.

weheartit

However, I'm a hobag for a good sale so when my dream yarn came up for cheap, I snatched up a hank of this pretty alpaca/silk blend in a color called Shallows. I loooooove the name as the colors remind me of the beach on Guam where I was baptized.

And here's a picture of it all knitted up.

Sargasso Shawl by Knitpicks

::le sigh::

If I'm lucky, I'll have it all knitted up by Christmas. It will look glorious with the black taffeta and brocade Christmas dress I'm planning. Expect lots of skirt, yards of crinoline underskirt, and perhaps a peek of decolletage.

To my surprise, my husband did not end up having to call the fire department to come cut me out of this stuff using the jars of life. And it didn't take long to ball it up either, only one viewing of one crappy ass kung fu movie set in the Wild Wild West and featuring Geoffrey Rush. Yes, I said Geoffrey Rush. Ugh, this is the crap you end up watching when you have boys.

On the good news front, pete was more than willing to hold my yarn while I balled it up.

He's so useful, that kid. Remind me of that when I'm threatening to sell him.

Sunday Dinner

Oh what a beautiful morning!

My children made me breakfast on Sunday. Okay, so I made them make breakfast. This makes me responsible for the girlchild leaving the house this morning looking like she caught a case of the measles. I'd almost rather she had. Then, I wouldn't have to explain that I let my kid get popped in the face by a roving band of melted butter that hopped right from the frying pan and onto her skin. Dude, totally her fault for dropping a piece of ham on to the skillet from a high point, right? Or, yanno, my fault for not paying attention while she was cooking.

Then there was the moment when we got to church I asked pete where the diaper bag was.

"Oh, you must have forgotten it at home, mommy."

Wut, who?? I, who said, pete, get my purse and the diaper bag and go get in the car?

Yeah, sure, I forgot it. ::eyeroll:: Thank God pudding didn't have a massive blow out at church because what better way is there to spend your Mother's day than getting shat on by your own kid.

Le sigh.

Let's talk about dinner, shall we?

Before you yell at my husband for making me cook on Mother's Day, please understand that I adore our Sunday dinner tradition. I plan the menu well in advance, researching recipes, wondering if I should buy a new serving platter or baking pan, what new food to offer up, etc. I planned this Sunday's dinner before I even realized what today was and once it was planned, the hounds of hell couldn't stop me from looking forward to making my very first poundcake and attempting homemade beef pot pie.

Since my greatgrandmother taught me to eat my veggies before dessert, let's start with dinner. For my Sunday Dinners, I've been working with the Cover and Bake cookbook from America's Test Kitchen. I cannot rave enough about the awesomeness contained in these marvelous pages. In addition to some kick ass recipes perfectly suited for my tastes, as a bonus, this book spends a huge amount of time explaining why they've chosen to make the recipe the way they did, how to select ingredients, and what type of equipment to use. Even if you know how to cook well and can easily tie up the perfect pork roast, I guarantee you this book will teach you things you didn't know.

Today, it taught me to make a perfect pot pie. First, the ingredients.

You'll also need your favorite biscuit dough or pie crust recipe.

So now that you've got all that gathered, let's proceed. Heat up the butter in a large pot and cook the beef, seasoning with salt and pepper until browned. Remove from pan and set aside. While resisting the urge to shove all the tasty beef down your gullet, brown the onion and carrots. Stir in the garlic then sprinkle in the flour. Keep stirring and cook flour until golden brown. Then slowly add the wine, scraping up any browned bits. Next, pour in the chicken broth, tomato paste, and thyme. Stir until smooth. Dump the beef you haven't managed to eat back into the pot and stick a lid on it. Then let that bad boy simmer on low until the beef is nice and tender.

Slap the whole shebang in cassarole dish. I used buttermilk biscuit dough for my topping. I rolled it out, stamped out about 12 biscuits and laid them on top all nice like. Then I baked it at 400 for about 20 minutes or until the biscuits were nice and brown.

Profit.

So for mother's day, mr man gave me exactly what I wanted, another opportunity to turn out an amazing dinner, not because I'm the type of sap who lovingly declares how much they just love taking care of their family but because I like being a grade A attention whore in my cute apron.

Day two

It's days like this I remember why I have children, yanno, beyond the slave labor aspect. Hey, groceries don't carry themselves into the house, you know.

Anyhow, I have recruited my children as little helpers in my blogging endeavors, primarily to be my personal photographers. Sure, I could get their father to do it but then I have to resist the urge to choke his tall ass out when he gives me that annoying "wut" face for taking five million pictures a day and actually being the type of person who has a blog. What can I say? The man is a seventy year old man in a thirty seven year old body. So I bypass his pursed lipped judgement and finagle the children into doing my dirty work. They do want dinner, yes?

The minute the spill into my house, dropping permission slips here, hoodies there, and leaving notebook paper and pencil nubs in their wake, I pick off a particularly eager looking one and usher them outside for picture taking time. Today, we had to make a pit stop in the land of "what did mommy buy today" to give pinky a dress I found for her at Goodwill. Then, I had to sit and wait while she changed immediately. On one hand, I'm delighted by how much she loves her $1.99 dress. On the other, I WANT MY PICTURE TAKEN, DAMMIT!

I'm glad I waited though because she trilled me. After taking my picture, she decided I should do her a solid and take her picture too and because she's a joiner, she wants it posted on the blog too.

So now that you've suffered that barely entertaining, meandering story, here's the pictures.

What's that I see in the trees?
World peace?

The top was done up in two hours out of some knit I have in my stash. I think I picked it up on the clearance table at Hancock's. But it's been a few years. The skirt is Sandra Lee Me Made, aka, barely made by me at all. But instead of being paid millions of dollars to ice a store bought cake with canned frosting on national television while drunk on peach schnapps and delusion, I took a Goodwill maxi dress, cut off the top, sewed in an elastic waistband and called it good.

Here it is in it's pre-Snarktastical glory.



Who doesn't love a little uniboob in the morning?

 And here's the oft hilarious pinky in her Goodwill dress, perfect as it is.



Whirled peas? I don't get it.


Perfect as she is. Nope, I gave her absolutely no direction on either where we ought to take this picture or how she ought to pose. Pinky just climbed her happy little butt up on that wall and stunted like her mama, facial expression and all.

She slays me.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've been ordered to make her a maxi skirt. I'd feel put upon if I wasn't fully aware that in a couple years, she'll be bending over backwards to be my complete opposite. I better enjoy having a mimicking shadow while I can.